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Ashirbaad
In Bengali weddings, the Ashirbaad ceremony is a pre-wedding ritual that happens after the Adan Pradan. This private custom is held at home with both families present, and a priest is invited to look at the couple’s horoscopes to find the best date for them. The family elders and the priest sit on Shital Pati or decorative mats and decide the wedding date. While it is a simple occasion, the families will exchange gifts, sweets, fish, betel leaves, and betel nuts (Paan-supari) and celebrate the first step towards the wedding. Traditionally, the family used to write the date, time, and name of the couple as well as the dory using sindoor (vermillion) and haldi (turmeric) using a coin and get it signed by the witness. This served as a written agreement of the wedding. Nowadays, a verbal agreement is enough. Once the wedding dates are decided, the two families come together to bless or give ‘Ashirbaad’ to the bride and groom. Aashirbaad is the Bengali version of the Engagement ceremony. The only difference is that the couple are not required to exchange rings, although some modern couples may still do so. The main event of this ceremony is the future in-law's gift the couple husked rice, dubyo or treifol leaves, fish and sweets. They also give them jewellery and clothes they can wear during the wedding. Earlier, the groom's family was always the first to perform Ashirbad, as they were considered to be of a higher stature for accepting the bride, but that’s not necessarily followed today.
Cultural Significance
The Ashirbaad ceremony typically takes place before the wedding day and is a beautiful occasion for families to connect and bless their children. They show their acceptance of the couple by giving them gifts and blessings.
The use of husked rice and trefoil leaves is considered lucky and believed to bring prosperity and good fortune. This custom is a warm and happy one that sets the tone for the Bengali wedding to come.
Fashioning Tradition
The traditional choice for a bride on the day of Ashirbaad is a Bengali silk saree. One of the most popular choices is the Banarasi silk saree. A bold red, pink, or blue saree with gold zari motifs looks elegant and regal. Alternatively, she can also wear a Dhakai Jamdani silk saree. Originating from Dhaka, these sarees are known for their ‘Panna hazar’ or ‘Thousand emeralds’ patterns, which feature rows of delicate florals embroidered in gold and silver threads. Because of the tedious and meticulous technique, Jamdani sarees are particularly coveted.
For brides who prefer a more understated look, the Tant silk saree is ideal.
Known for their soft fabric and subtle sheen, these sarees are often embroidered with motifs inspired by nature, mythology, and folklore, adding much meaning to the ensemble.
For the Ashirbaad ceremony, the groom also dresses in traditional Bengali attire. One of the most common choices is the classic dhoti-kurta set. The dhoti is typically made of cotton or silk with gold borders. Some grooms may go for a sherwani, a long silk coat embroidered with embroidery, zari work, and embellishments. He can wear this over a matching churidar, pants, or dhoti and accessorise with a stole or dupatta. For a modern look without the hassle of a sherwani, the groom can wear a tailored suit or bandhgala ensemble.
Jewellery & Accessories
The Bengali bride is spoilt for choice when it comes to her jewellery. For the Ashirbaad, an elegant and understated look is preferred which allows her to wear certain statement ornaments that standout on their own. One of the most iconic pieces of jewellery worn by a Bengali bride is the ‘chik’, ??a heavy gold necklace encrusted with precious gemstones like diamonds, rubies, or emeralds. She can pair this with matching Jhumko earrings or Kaan Pashas, gold studs.
Image Credits
Tour My India | Wedding Sutra | Milan Magic | Wedding Wire | Pinterest | Instagram | Mandap | Alamy | Ptaufiq Photography | Quora | India Times