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In Uttar Pradesh, the Tilak is a pre-wedding ceremony setting an auspicious vibe for the forthcoming marriage. While the Roka ceremony represents the groom’s family accepting the proposal, the Tilak ceremony represents the bride’s family accepting the groom. Traditionally, the bride’s father performs the Tilak ceremony. The bride’s father, brother, and elders visit the groom’s home to apply tilak or teeka on the groom’s forehead. Most families hold the Tilak ceremony in the groom’s house, but few may prefer to do the rituals in a temple. The Tilak ceremony usually begins with a puja where the bride and the groom’s families pray for the couple’s happiness. Sometimes, a priest is called at home to perform the havan (prayer performed before a sacred fire). Once the puja is completed, the bride’s father, brother, or a male member applies a paste of Kumkum and a few grains of rice on the groom’s forehead. This Kumkum or red vermillion paste is called Tilak. This Tilak signifies that the father has found a loving husband for his daughter. The bride’s father then offers gifts to the groom and his family. The gifts differ from family to family but usually include sweets, fruits, dry fruits, and clothes. Likewise, the groom’s father gives the bride and their family members sweets, dry fruits, rice, clothes, and jewellery. After exchanging gifts, the fathers of the bride and groom place garlands over each other to symbolise the joining of the families.
The Tilak ceremony in Uttar Pradesh weddings is one of the initial pre-wedding ceremonies with profound cultural significance. It lays the foundation for subsequent rituals and ceremonies. Tilak has been applied to the groom for centuries to balance his Ajna Chakra, representing the third eye.
Putting raw rice over it signifies clearing the presence of any negative energy. The vermillion denotes purity and is believed to act as a silent confidence booster. It has also become an eventful ritual, with traditional folk music and dance forming a part of the ceremony.
In the past, the bride was not present at the Tilak, but these days, the bride and groom attend almost every ceremony together. Sometimes, the families also combine the Tilak and Mangini ceremonies. In Uttar Pradesh, the bride and groom generally wear Indian ethnic attire for their wedding and post-wedding functions. The bride usually dresses in a semi-formal outfit such as a salwar kameez. Sometimes, the bride may wear a saree or lehenga choli. The choice of colours ranges from pinks and blues to greens and yellows. The outfit can be silk or cotton, embroidered or digitally printed, plain or embellished.
In Uttar Pradesh, the groom usually dresses in traditional attire for the Tilak ceremony. It can either be a kurta pyjama or a kurta churidar. It is made of cotton or silk and mostly in light pastel colours. It may feature minimal embroidery or embellishments. Some grooms may like to wear slightly formal Sherwanis, Nehru jackets, or Bandhgalas. Whatever the outfit, traditional jutis or mojris and the right jewellery complete the look.
For the Tilak ceremony, both the bride and groom wear simple jewellery that highlights their traditional attire, holds symbolism, and reflects the auspiciousness of the occasion. Today, the bride wears a Maaangtikka as a fashion statement, but it has been worn as the quintessential part of Solah Shringar for centuries. The Mangtikka is believed to bring prosperity and protect the bride from the evil eye. The bride also wears delicate jhumkas, gold necklaces, bangles, and rings to complement her outfit without being overly elaborate.
Similarly, the groom also wears gold jewellery for his Tilak ceremony. It is primarily a ring, a gold chain with or without a pendant, and a bracelet or Kada. However, some grooms, if they prefer wearing more formal Indian attire, may opt for slightly more elaborate jewellery, including cufflinks and buttons. Lastly, depending on the ethnic attire, the groom wears a decorative waistband or belt called Kamaal or Kamarbandh, an accessory worn by grooms in their ethnic attire.
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